Self-confidence plays a significant role in your life. It shows up in your interactions with others and in your self-evaluation. How you feel about yourself often determines how you show up.
Self-confidence starts with how you perceive yourself. If you think you're great, you're great. And if you think you're not great, you’re not. Sometimes, you might actually be very great, but in your head, you feel like you're not.
At the end of the day, your greatness can be hindered because you don’t see it. You don’t go forth to actualize your dreams due to self-imposed barriers. Low self-confidence can hold you back from reaching your full potential.
Here’s how to improve your self-confidence.
1. Pay Attention to Your Appearance
This might sound superficial, but how you look correlates with how you feel about yourself. There's a popular saying: “Dress how you want to be addressed.” People tend to treat you based on how you look. And this is not about seeking validation from people. No, it's about radiating positive energy from within. When you're well put together, you will feel confident.
Self-confidence stems from how you perceive yourself. It's not necessarily what you are or who you are. It's not a direct measure of yourself but a perception. If you put in the effort to look good, your confidence will naturally be high. You'll feel like you're on top of the world when you step out. And you’ll be in your element when you engage with others.
Remember to always dress how you want to be addressed. For instance, if you dress like a business executive, you’ll subconsciously begin to behave like one. Business executives are confident because of their accomplishments. They take their time to talk. They're not all over the place.
2. Don’t Compare Yourself to Others
Comparison is unhealthy. When you compare yourself to other people, you create room for dissatisfaction, envy, and inadequacy. All of a sudden, you'll start seeing everything you don't have in your life and neglect everything you do have.
We all have different journeys in life. Your journey is different from someone else's journey. Own your journey and be proud of your path.
Comparison creates room for discontent, which is a negative energy. Not being content makes you dismiss your efforts and accomplishments.
Count your blessings. There are so many people looking forward to having what you have. You have their desires, but instead of appreciating them, you’re focused on other people.
Self-confidence is about how you feel. If you keep feeling like other people are better than you because of the things that they have, you’ll never feel good about yourself. This will make you feel inferior.
Ditch the comparison. Pay attention to yourself. Be content with your journey and believe that it can only get better.
Comparison makes you define your life based on other people's standards. Imagine living your life by other people's standards. It means you're constantly in a race trying to meet up. That's an unhealthy way to live, isn’t it? Live by your own standards. Set your own rules. Don't follow someone else's rules.
If you have so-called friends who are all about the competition, it's about time that you lose them. You don't need those kinds of people in your life. You need people who are content with themselves, so you won't feel pressured to compare yourself to others.
3. Know What You Want
The thing about knowing what you want is that, if you don't know what you want, you’ll take anything that is thrown at you. When you know what you want, you can voice your opinions, likes, and dislikes. The way you express yourself reflects your self-confidence.
If you don't know what you want in any situation, you'll find it difficult to express yourself. When you engage with others, state where you stand in that engagement or interaction; otherwise, they might want to sway you.
If you're not cool with something, you need to state that. If you're cool with it, let them know. Not expressing yourself indicates that you’re not confident. It tells people that this person doesn't know what they want, and that's an opportunity for them to impose their beliefs and ideologies on you.
Knowing what you want entails identifying what makes you come alive and aligns with your beliefs. If something doesn't align with your belief, you need to make it clear to whomever you're talking to.
You can't afford to always be on the fence. People who are always on the fence wait for other people to take the initiative before they move forward. Don't be that person who is always waiting on someone else to move before they move, because you’ll be in the shadows of others.
4. Avoid People Who Talk Down to You
You don't need people who bring negative energy into your life. Remember that your self-confidence is how you perceive yourself. Engaging with people who make you feel less could make you start seeing yourself as less.
If you constantly listen to people who project negativity onto you, you will begin to reason. You begin to see all the negativity they are bringing your way, and it starts to take its toll on your personality. You don't need all of that.
Some people derive so much pleasure from making others feel bad. They never see anything good in others. They're always pointing out the bad stuff. You don't need those kinds of people in your life.
Build a circle of people who genuinely care about you. People who love you and want to see you succeed. People who want you to be the best that you can be.
Guard your space and thoughts. Don't let any negative person come into your life. Don't give them that privilege. Surround yourself with only supportive minds. Being around people who pull you down could instill constant fear in you.
5. Practice Positive Affirmations
Leverage positive affirmations and self-talk. If you tell yourself that you can do something, you empower yourself to do it. If you say you're good enough, you give yourself a chance to be good enough. And if you say you are the best, you’re indeed the best. You’re whatever you say that you are.
It's about time that you started believing it. Get rid of those negative thoughts and that little voice in your head telling you that you can't do it. It's about time that you shut it up. Nothing is impossible. The sky is only your starting point if you say it and believe it without a single doubt.
Self-confidence is a thing of the mind. Do away with the negative feelings now. Whenever you make a mistake, instead of saying, "Oh, I'm such a loser," why don't you say, "I can do better next time." That's a better way to look at it. Yes, you failed this time, but who says you can't do better next time?
The next time someone tells you that you're not good enough, look them in the eye and you say, "You know what? I am the best there is." And over time, those positive affirmations begin to show in your life, just the way negative affirmations will take a toll on you if you dwell on them.